Is Working On Relationship Problems the Wrong Way to Go?

Relationship problems are real attention grabbers.

It's hard not to figure that if I could just work this or that thing out, get her to stop do this, start doing that, maybe even do some starting or stopping of a few things myself (or maybe not), then life would be good. Wouldn't it?

Well, maybe, maybe not, but probably not. In fact, I am convinced that hashing out problems the way most of us go at it is a dead end. A miserable dead end at that.

Why? There are different ideas on that that you can check out here.

But the general idea is that relationship problems, like ideas of compatibility, are a good indication that something is wrong. It's just that trying to solve them rarely works (never? nothing never happens, but almost never).