Relationship Rehab?

Over the years whenever I worked with good drug counselors I was impressed with the value they placed on going to treatment, to rehab. "At least once a year and I'd go more often if I could afford it" my first supervisor in drug and alcohol counseling told me. Frankly, I didn't get it then.

When 10 years later another drug and alcohol specialist who I respect answered in response to a question about how to respond to drugs being found at a neighborhood middle school party, again the answer was "treatment, 28 days of by attending a good treatment program with it's emphasis on self-knowledge, self-control, emotional awareness, etc. " He paused a moment and said that he suspected that all young men would probably be well served by getting the kind of attention and support usually reserved for people who have gotten into trouble with drugs and alcohol, before they even had a chance to get into trying to cope with the realities of life by using substances or any other behavior with addictive potential.

When I re-read "I Don't Want to Talk About It" by Terrence Real recently, there was the same argument. Wrapped in a different package, but the same point. The idea that it might be a kind of depression is still attractive to me as much as anything because it suggests corrective actions, but it doesn't really matter.

Can't help but wonder though if we couldn't habilitate better in the first place so that we don't have so much need to rehabilitate? Or, maybe it's the wrong way to look at things all the way around. I don't know.

Since my selfish interest is on what us old and getting older guys can do with our relationship now, I used the term "rehab", but for the future, it's a thought.

Men's Latent Depression & Relationships

Am re-reading I Don't Want To Talk About It by Terrence Real on the topic of what he called latent depression in men and how it affects everything we do, especially in relationships.

This is one of those cases where I know I read it before because I can see my marks and notes on the pages, but I must have missed half of it the first time through. LOL

He does a beautiful job of pulling together a lot of research, philosophy, literature, and clinical observation to make a very strong case. Valuable reading.